As I steadily move into the twilight (ugh, maybe sunset but I won’t admit it yet) of my twenties, an increasing number of friends and random people on my social media radar are getting hitched. Even though I am still shocked every time I hear of another person my age biting the bullet (because in my mind I am still sixteen years old), I am so happy for them. My shock and awe has nothing to do with bitterness, jealousy, or any other catty bitch feelings. It’s always from a genuine place of, “But we’re still so young!!”
“Girl,” I have to remind myself. “You ain’t that young any more.”
When one of my closest friends finally tied the knot with her boyfriend of seven years, I was over the moon with happiness for both of them. I was so honored to be part of their special day, and she did a beautiful job with the wedding. However, for a long time I still couldn’t get used to referring to him as her husband! He was (and probably still is) her awesome boyfriend in my mind, because I knew him as such for so long.
This brings me to my question for Dating & Hookup Universe. It’s come to my attention that terms like “hubs,” and “hubby” are extremely common pet names used publicly for husbands. I am a big proponent of marriage, monogamy, and loving someone long enough that you’ll have to eventually wipe their butt at some point. But these nick names for the wonderful men who were lucky enough to nab a great girl for eternity…I don’t know if I can get on board. In a sense, it feels like the most important man in a woman’s life is reduced to a rom-com archetype of what a husband should be. Its almost always used in the way you’d refer to a purse coming with you somewhere.
Am I nuts? I feel like someone should speak up for the awesome men who are more than just accessories! Let’s talk about it in the comments.
Heather is a contributing editor at the-dah. She is a Los Angeles based writer, improviser, snacker, social media mistress, and aspiring adult. Read more of her food-stained stories about growing up weird at Terrible-Twenties.com, or follow her digital alter ego @MissHezah on Twitter.
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