Rejection is one of those things, isn’t it?
Even when you tell yourself, “This could go either way. I know I might not get the outcome I am hoping for. I am prepared for that,” it’s hard to actually be ready for it.
Nobody wants to get bad news. Nobody wants to hear the opposite of what they were hoping for.
There are a lot of affirmations out there – I’m sure you’ve seen a few on Instagram or Pinterest – that say “be brave” and “go forth” and “all you need is courage to do something amazing.” And all of that is true. You should be brave. Going forward is the best way to go. Staying in place is no good (physically it might be fine, we’re talking mentally and emotionally here) and going backwards is worse. Everybody tells you to take that chance, and they should.
But then, after that, what do you do?
What do you do if you worked up all of your courage and things still didn’t quite play out the way you had hoped? What if you took a leap of faith and it turns out you may have leaped in the wrong direction? Or came up short? And how many people are super-good at leaping anyway?
What you’re supposed to do is move on. Accept it and go. Try a little differently next time. Or find something new to get excited about.
Yet I think it’s impossible to not take a moment or several and be a little bit sad. Isn’t that normal? Isn’t that natural, to be bummed when, for some reason, the stars didn’t align quite right this time around?
I’m not suggesting that anybody dwell on the bummers of life. That would fall under the category of “going backwards,” which we already decided was the worst. But I think it’s necessary to take stock of your emotional situation and say, “I wanted this thing. It did not happen. That doesn’t feel great, because I cared a lot.” It’s okay to care about things and then be sad.
We can’t all forge ahead with gusto 100% of the time. That’s exhausting, and more importantly, it doesn’t allow time for anybody to experience a full range of healthy emotions.
Take an hour, an afternoon, a day if necessary. Understand that you’re sad because you cared. And then?
Accept it and go. Try a little differently next time. Find something new to get excited about. You’ll know.
Thanks to Gratisography for the image.
(Originally appeared on Meg Moving Forward)
Megan S. is an associate editor at Dating & Hookup. She's a big fan of trees, baseball, running, and pop culture.
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