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I started “going out with” my first boyfriend at a very awkward 16.
This year marks the tenth anniversary of my being an active participant in the modern dating world. And, in honor of such a milestone, on my birthday I did something very nerdy and pretentious. I wrote a letter to my younger self–or more accurately my 16-year-old self.
When I was that very awkward 16, I was a theatre kid, and I felt things deeply; so deeply that for many years I could-not-would-not re-visit those feelings. It was just (sniff) too (sniff) painful. But now I’m 26 and I will say this: when you’re 16, and your boobs are sort of starting to come in, and the bass player of local teenage boy band Tony Flow is just hormonal enough to think you’re cute and call you his–you’ve got it made. And that’s the easiest dating will ever be.
If you asked pretty much any single (ie. not married) 20-something female, I’m sure she would tell you that sometimes she feels a little crazy. There’s career obsession, battling the last of those deep-rooted insecurities, sudden awareness of a biological time clock, baby fever, knowing she’s probably peaking in physical attractiveness, and the trying to be a strong, grown up woman…it’s a busy time. And all of that business is somehow intrinsically linked to her love life.
It’s just (heavy sigh) complicated.
Oh, 16-year-old Kirsten, you had it made. And here’s why.
But by 26, you’re fairly certain you’ve got it all figured out. So what’s the deal?
(A decade from now, 36-year-old Kirsten will be rolling her eyes reading this. Because she surely has her sh*t together.)
(I hope.)
Thanks for the image MBird!
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Kirsten is an LA-based writer, actor and all around slave to the entertainment industry. Most days she can be found drinking way too much coffee, playing one of three songs she knows on the ukulele, and genuinely over-thinking every interaction she has with every other human being she encounters. You can read more about her silly adventures at https://loveandadd.com/blog, or follow her on twitter @KirstenKnisely.
datingandhookup.com is a website that explores modern romance in the Millennial era – which, let’s be honest, looks nothing like we were taught to expect. We feature essays, advice and social commentary with humor, compassion and brains, and we vow never, ever to publish a piece called “The 10 Best Ways to Satisfy Your Man in Bed”. Do click to submit your work to us. We love you.
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