Something weird is happening to me and my female friends — we’re unable to accept even the simplest little compliment. I don’t mean to sound like we’re getting complimented all day because we’re just oh-so-wonderful; I mean that when one of us is complimented, or if we compliment each other, we’re unable to just accept the compliment. It usually comes with some form of, “Oh, no, I look that crap today, but thank you” self insult.
Ladies, accept the compliment!
(And I’m not talking about scenarios when some skeevy dude hits on you by complimenting your body in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable — that’s not something you should accept. I’m talking about scenarios when someone kindly tells you, “You look really cute today” or “Your eyes are so pretty” — I’m talking about a heartfelt, well-intended compliment.)
I don’t know what it is, why we’ve been trained to deflect compliments, but so many of my female friends do. Ladies, I’m telling you, you have every right to accept a compliment and leave it at that. Please don’t feel like you have to put yourself down in the process. Please don’t feel like you have to deflect it.
If someone compliments you, simply smile and say, “Thank you.” You may be tempted to explain why they’re wrong (I know I feel this way sometimes), but don’t. A compliment is like a gift, and when someone gives you a gift, you say thank you. And you usually say it with a clear, confident voice. You can still be humble while accepting a compliment, if that’s what you’re worried about. I promise.
Own it! Be proud of it! I personally resolve to be better an accepting compliments. It’s so nice of someone to take a moment out of their day to say something nice about me, and I want to honor that with an un-muddled thank you. I don’t want to feel like I have to insult myself in order to accept their compliment.
Why do I do that? Why do some of us do that? It has to stop. Now. We are worthy of compliments.
We can do it!
Photo by Jesslee Cuizon via Flickr.
Almie Rose is a writer from Los Angeles. She has a blog, Apocalypstick. In addition to Dating & Hookup she also writes for Hello Giggles, The Frisky, Thought Catalog, and Genlux Magazine. Her book, I Forgot To Be Famous, is out now. You can follow her on twitter @apocalypstick. Her favorite pastime is eating and drinking and sleeping and then eating again.
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