It seems like you can’t throw a sandwich in this town without hitting a new dating app. (But why waste a sandwich like that? That’s distressing.) Now that Tinder is raising its prices, I figured it wouldn’t take long for another app to step up and try to reclaim the dating app throne. Is Bumble that dating app?
A few things about Bumble. It was created by Whitney Wolfe, a Tinder co-creator. She parted with Tinder last year, leaving sexual harassment and workplace discriminations in her wake. Wolfe says Bumble is specifically geared towards women in the 18-35 demographic. Here’s how it works: women make the first move. If they see someone they fancy, they have 24 hours to reach out and send that first message, or their match is gone forever. Wolfe describes it as being, “Sadie Hawkins inspired.”
Here’s what people are saying about the app, taken from the App store reviews:
Been on the app for almost a week and I’ve only had 1 girl match me back, but then she didn’t contact me and it’s been crickets since. I have always had good results with Tinder – successful dates and a few regular buddies – and my last 2 year relationship came from OkCupid. So I’m not sure what’s going on with this, maybe there just aren’t enough people on here yet? Either way, it’s well designed so it gets 2 stars, but zero stars for zero results.
Okay, well that makes sense; in order for the app to be a success, more women have to use it. It’s new, it might get there. But then you have reviews like this (titled “Novel concept, but can’t fight millions of years of evolution”):
Very nicely designed app, but you can’t change human nature — or evolution over millions of years. Men approach women… Women want to be pursued. Hard to change that when there are other options.
That kind of attitude isn’t going to be changed with an app. Are men truly miffed that for a change, women are the one’s asking? I mean, come on, what year is it?? Can this dude really not handle being “pursued” by a woman? And how does he know that “women want to be pursued”? Has he ever stopped to think that maybe no, they don’t? Maybe they’d rather step up, confident as all hell, and do some pursuing of their own?
After all, isn’t it kind of empowering to put women in this position? That’s what Wolfe thinks. She believes her app gives women power, saying,
We wanted to modernize dating. I’ll go out with groups of my friends and someone will see a cute guy across the room, or in the bar, or in the restaurant. She’ll be like, “Oh, he’s so cute, I wish I could talk to him!” And then we all encourage her—”Go say hi, go send him a drink, go do something!”—and she never does. There’s this unwritten rule that it’s not ladylike, or it’s wrong, or the guy should go first. The whole thing feels silly and outdated! Women are extremely independent in every facet of our lives, except dating. We wanted to encourage a confident connection. Making the first move, whether a woman is matching with a man or a woman, gives her a boost of confidence right off the bat. It immediately puts her in the driver’s seat.
I agree with that. Now, to be perfectly honest, I’m in a relationship, and therefore won’t be using Bumble. But if I were single, would I try it?
Hell yeah! Look, we’re not going to change everyone’s years of thinking overnight with one app. There are clearly men out there who are put off by this, and either their minds will change, or they won’t. But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try something new. I’m all for women having confidence, and lord knows, you need lots of it when you’re dating.
Ladies, would you use Bumble?
Almie Rose is a writer from Los Angeles. She has a blog, Apocalypstick. In addition to Dating & Hookup she also writes for Hello Giggles, The Frisky, Thought Catalog, and Genlux Magazine. Her book, I Forgot To Be Famous, is out now. You can follow her on twitter @apocalypstick. Her favorite pastime is eating and drinking and sleeping and then eating again.
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