Welcome back to Best Lady Tweets! Everyone have a good week? I’ve got some piping hot tweets for you to keep you smiling through the weekend from some of the greatest ladies on Twitter. Enjoy!
It's ok to use emojis on a resume, yeah?
— Ali Spagnola (@alispagnola) March 1 2021
Sorry, this is my first time. Is it ok if I smoke while holding your baby?
— Noodles (@Dawn_M_) March 5 2021
All my cereal boxes look like they've been opened by a very stoned Wolverine.
— ghost mom (@radtoria) February 27 2021
KID: Why's the sky blue DAD: It's sad MOM: Light refraction DAD: … MOM: … DAD: (*mumbling*) light refraction
— Batkaren (@batkaren) March 5 2021
A maybe is a no that couldn’t think fast enough on its feet.
— Erica (@SCbchbum) February 25 2021
I've had 5 cups of coffee and now both of my dead grandmothers are giving me Words With Friends hints.
— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) March 4 2021
Good Cop: We’re trying to help you. Bad Cop: You’re gonna rot in prison! Fosse Cop: *jazz hands*
— Quinn Sutherland (@ReelQuinn) March 5 2021
The Sound Of Music is my favorite movie musical about a guy leaving his relationship to go fuck the nanny.
— Princess Kim (@RealPrincessKim) March 5 2021
I cut my own bangs and now I look like a 7 year old child with a middle-aged face so hopefully that's the "in" thing right now.
— Tiffany (@Leggalicious) March 4 2021
And your number one tweet is…
the last time I tried fist bumping someone I ended up punching myself in the stomach. either high five me or get the hell out of my car
— Mary Charlene (@IamEnidColeslaw) March 3 2021
Almie Rose is a writer from Los Angeles. She has a blog, Apocalypstick. In addition to Dating & Hookup she also writes for Hello Giggles, The Frisky, Thought Catalog, and Genlux Magazine. Her book, I Forgot To Be Famous, is out now. You can follow her on twitter @apocalypstick. Her favorite pastime is eating and drinking and sleeping and then eating again.
datingandhookup.com is a website that explores modern romance in the Millennial era – which, let’s be honest, looks nothing like we were taught to expect. We feature essays, advice and social commentary with humor, compassion and brains, and we vow never, ever to publish a piece called “The 10 Best Ways to Satisfy Your Man in Bed”. Do click to submit your work to us. We love you.
Follow me on Twitter