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Megan S. is an associate editor at Dating & Hookup. She's a big fan of trees, baseball, running, and pop culture.
Rejection is one of those things, isn’t it?
Even when you tell yourself, “This could go either way. I know I might not get the outcome I am hoping for. I am prepared for that,” it’s hard to actually be ready for it.
Nobody wants to get bad news. Nobody wants to hear the opposite of what they were hoping for.
There are a lot of affirmations out there – I’m sure you’ve seen a few on Instagram or Pinterest – that say “be brave” and “go forth” and “all you need is courage to do something amazing.” And all of that is true. You should be brave. Going forward is the best way to go. Staying in place is no good (physically it might be fine, we’re talking mentally and emotionally here) and going backwards is worse. Everybody tells you to take that chance, and they should.
But then, after that, what do you do?
Sometimes it’s hard to know when to say “I love you” in a relationship. Worries about saying it too soon, not getting the desired response, who says it first, what the next step in the relationship is after that — all of these things might make a person want to wait for the exact right time to say how they feel. But, if you love really someone, would you ever wait EIGHT YEARS to tell them?
In this video from This American Life, one couple did just that — until Maia decided that the time was finally right.
Valentine’s Day is tomorrow, but that doesn’t mean you have to wait to celebrate the other special relationships that bring you happiness on a daily basis. You can get started today by celebrating Galentine’s Day!
A few years ago on “Parks and Recreation,” Leslie Knope taught us that Galentine’s Day is a wonderful opportunity to let the ladies in your life know how much their friendship means to you. So call up your friends, sisters, cousins, mom, grandma, whoever you want — and let them know how awesome they are.
Few things will force you to examine what you want out of life the way that a four-hour round-trip drive to a baby shower with three married friends, a toddler, and a newborn will.
This was the position I found myself in a few weeks ago. I was happy to be traveling with these ladies; I don’t see them very often and they’re fun to be with. We traded stories about the advantages and disadvantages of everybody’s jobs, choosing paint colors for different rooms, favorite new music, and the best cities to visit or live in. It was nice to be able to chime in on most of those topics. But, inevitably, there was talk of husbands, weddings, daycare, planning family activities—none of which I minded talking about, but also none of which I could relate to, even though I so wanted to be able to.
I’ve said before that I never dreamed about my wedding day as a kid, and I think part of that was because I didn’t think I needed to dream about it. I assumed it would happen. Grow up, get a job, get married. That’s what 99% of the adults in my life did. Those three milestones seemed automatic. Adulthood. Job. Marriage. My friends have experienced those moments in their lives, whereas I seem to be stalling on the marriage part—and not on purpose.
May your days be merry and bright! Enjoy the long weekend and we’ll see you next week.
Happy Thanksgiving from Dating & Hookup! Enjoy the holiday weekend with friends, family, and food!
So you had a summer fling, and it was pretty great. Now that summer’s basically over, the fling is too…right? Or do your plans for fall include picking just so many apples? Michelle Markowitz and David Ross show us that for some people, relationships can be a little tricky to define after Labor Day.
Before you have the perfect wedding, you have to create the perfect wedding invitation. This usually means getting the colors right, choosing a beautiful yet legible font, and making sure all of the pieces fit nicely inside the envelope. For some brides, however, this isn’t enough; the exterior of the envelope requires just as much attention to detail. Writer Katie Baker cared about those details when planning her own wedding, which led to her discovery of the tiny post office in Bridal Veil, Oregon. She explains:
Each year between March and August, some 150,000 envelopes containing save-the-dates or request-the-honour-of-your-presences are specifically, and even militantly, directed to this particular spot. In a tiny room filled with boxes of envelopes that during high season approach hoarder height, Canzler personally processes every piece of wedding mail, one by one, marking each with a custom postmark and cancellation she designed to honor a place she has long fought to protect.
Read the rest of Baker’s excellent “Love Letters” article at Grantland.
First dates can be nerve-wracking. First of all, you’re concerned about doing everything right on your end of things—wearing something flattering yet comfortable, keeping an open mind, following the hundreds of dating-etiquette rules that have been established over the course of human history, etc. But you also want to pay attention to the person across the table (that’s part of being on a date, right?), not only to make sure they’re having a good time, but also to gauge their level of interest in you.*
How do you interpret that interest? By the way he talks. He’s definitely attracted to you if there’s a sing-song quality to his voice.
You should also notice the kind of eye contact he makes. Whether he spends more time looking at your face or your body determines how he’s attracted to you.
Also make note of body language. And conversation topics. And how he’s dressed.
Happy Fourth of July from Dating & Hookup! Now get out there and watch some fireworks.
Social calendars around the country are filling up fast as spring rolls into summer, and chances are pretty good that you’ve got at least one wedding to attend in the next few months. If you already know who you’re taking, that’s awesome. Have fun! But maybe you’re not sure who will accompany you. Maybe you don’t want to take anybody—which is okay, right? Or maybe you’re not even sure if you’re supposed to bring a date.
Clearly there’s a lot to consider. Thankfully, Jen Doll, author of Save the Date: The Occasional Mortifications of a Serial Wedding Guest, wrote a helpful guide to help people figure out who to take as a plus-one to upcoming nuptials. She considers all of the tricky scenarios, too, like who to bring to a destination wedding, or what to do if you know you’ll be the only single person in attendance. Check out the full story over at The Date Report.
Confession: I have very vein-y hands. Also, my right index finger has a bit of a curve to it. My nails seem healthy, probably because they are never painted. And my knuckles are pretty bony, but I believe that’s normal as far as knuckles go. I don’t think anybody would notice these traits unless I pointed them out—but some people might argue otherwise.
Apparently there are people who do think others notice ‘flaws’ on their hands, which has resulted in the recent popularity of hand-lifts, an elective procedure that basically promises to improve the appearance of your hands. Social media has surely played a big part in this: you’ve probably seen at least one engagement ring picture on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram in the last few years, and some women want their hands to look better in these photos. Better as in…younger, I guess? More full? Less vein-y?
Of course there’s nothing wrong with wanting to post a picture of an engagement ring and hoping everything will look nice. Getting engaged is a big deal! A lot of people enjoy looking at these pictures and congratulating the bride-to-be! But honestly, who is paying attention to the state of your hands? It’s flesh, bone and blood vessels. Everybody knows that. And although my opinion matters very little to anybody who thinks hand-lifts are a good idea, I hope people will consider this matter with some perspective before investing in the procedure.
For more thoughts and information on the topic, check out this article at Bustle.
datingandhookup.com is a website that explores modern romance in the Millennial era – which, let’s be honest, looks nothing like we were taught to expect. We feature essays, advice and social commentary with humor, compassion and brains, and we vow never, ever to publish a piece called “The 10 Best Ways to Satisfy Your Man in Bed”. Do click to submit your work to us. We love you.
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