Uncomfortable silences, awkward pauses. We’ve all been in those kinds of conversations. But they can be ten times worse when they happen on a first date!
So, how do you keep the conversation flowing? We asked Dan Abelon, co-founder and CEO of SpeedDate.com for his top five first date topics.
1. Future Goals and Dreams
Asking about future dreams and goals is a great way to get a conversation moving and at the same time uncover a great deal of information about potential compatibility. After discovering that his dream of working a hotdog stand in the winter to fund his surfing habits in the summer may in fact be extremely interesting– you may opt to immediately place him in the friendship (rather than relationship) category.
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Pets and love of animals, in general, is another safe topic that has a dual compatibly component built into it. If you are the type to cart your Chihuahua around in your purse yet your new love interest “understands” where Michael Vick is coming from– chances are your relationship is doomed.
Unless reminiscing about past Spring Break conquests, travel is always a safe and interesting topic for a first date. Try to pick out little anecdotes that go along with a past journey that will further deepen the conversation — like a fabulous restaurant you discovered by talking with the locals.
For many of us, flirting is fun and effortless — as natural as breathing. For others, they’d rather stick toothpicks in their eyes. But hang on, terrible flirters — maybe it’s not that you can’t flirt — but just that you haven’t found the right flirting style yet.
Dr. Jeffery Hall, assistant professor of communication studies at the University of Kansas and his colleagues conducted a survey to determine the different types of flirts. The survey was published in Communication Quarterly.
“People often find themselves frustrated or unhappy with their ability to get others to notice them,” he says. “If we know more about what we do, and the likely outcomes of each style [of flirting], then it may give us insight into why we end up where we do.”
So what are the five styles of flirting? Dr. Hall breaks them down.
datingandhookup.com is a website that explores modern romance in the Millennial era – which, let’s be honest, looks nothing like we were taught to expect. We feature essays, advice and social commentary with humor, compassion and brains, and we vow never, ever to publish a piece called “The 10 Best Ways to Satisfy Your Man in Bed”. Do click to submit your work to us. We love you.
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