Bobbi Palmer is The Dating and Relationship Coach for Women over 40 and founder of Date Like a Grownup. She is not just a dating coach; she's a dating success story! Bobbi became a first-time wife at age 47 and has helped countless women around the world do what she did: find lasting love and companionship you can count on after 40. She describes her marriage as "the yummy icing on her already great cake" and prides herself on practicing what she preaches and teaches every single day. Bobbi uses her 6-Step Find Hope and Find Him System to help you learn to love and trust yourself and understand men...because that's what leads you to that man who will adore you forever. Bobbi invites you to join her for her free Grownup Girls' Night Out monthly webcasts. Register and learn more about how to find Your Man www.DateLikeaGrownup.com/ggno.
Are you an independent, smart single woman who is dating and looking for love? If so, you’ve likely been challenged with how to respond when a man does something that ticks you off. What are realistic expectations? What should you tolerate? I get asked this question in many forms.
It can be confusing. On the one hand, you have a strong desire to be liked and finally find The One. On the other hand, you are a confident woman who doesn’t want to put up with nonsense or be a pushover.
Here is how that conflict can look in real life: The part of you that wants to be liked accepts all sorts of silliness and disrespect, while the other part of you judges quickly and bails out at the first sign of trouble.
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Consider the situation of my client, Christine. During her coaching session she complained that a man she connected with online has been calling her after 10 p.m. She thought that was rude. (So do I.) She wakes up at 5 a.m., and it was affecting her sleep. She asked me if I thought she should say something to him. She was hesitant because she didn’t want to scare him away.
So I asked her: How would you deal with a girlfriend who kept calling at that hour? Her instant response was, “I’d talk to her and let her know that it wasn’t okay!”
There you go. It seems so clear if it’s a girlfriend, right? So why wouldn’t you respond the same way with a man you’re dating? This is a reasonable boundary. It’s intrusive behavior that affects your quality of life–not to mention it screams booty call.
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