Giuliana Ransick may seem like your average skinny betch Hollywood hostess with the mostess, but oh man is she more. She has the strength of a lioness wrapped in the frame of a skeleton, and she knows how to work it. I’d probably be skeletal too if I had three+ TV shows, two houses across the country to maintain, countless awards shows to red carpet, was a wife, was a mom, had cancer, and lord knows how many other things.
Speaking of me, Giuliana and I have treadmilled next to each other at the Chicago health club she and her husband Bill frequent along with none other than my parents, so don’t worry guys, we’re essentially kin. As seen on their Style Network show Giuliana&Bill, the duo have it fucking all. He won The Apprentice, people! America is their playground, and good for them. Despite having seriously arrived, hardships still befall them.
It is these difficulties life’s hand slaps across their faces that allows us opportunity to see a healthy relationship at work. Giuliana and Bill’s marriage is such a success because, unlike most reality TV couples, they choose to wade through the misery all the way to the happily ever after. American reality TV showcasing a healthy marriage? Whatever, you already know I love it.
As an American, I have the right to choose to love it. Americans have the freedom to choose how to live their lives, well for the most part #gayMarriage #abortion #otherTerribleLawsViolatingHumanRights. However, holding freedom as a value implies that choice is something valuable. It obviously is, but in this capitalist country, there are a select few individuals, for whom wealth has enabled them also to enjoy freedom from choice. In the loverly USofA when you’re rich, you can have it all! Giuliana&Bill is the epitome of TV as wealth wish-fulfillment.
These two don’t have to choose where to live or what to be, they work everywhere and have every job. Now for some reality stars, acquiring that freedom is enough. When life gets on them with an actual problem, they incorrectly don’t deal with it, because they’re rich enough to avoid their problems. Thus, many reality relationships end in divorce, counseling, various depressions and the like (see my previous articles beetchesssss). It is G&B’s persistence in choosing to uphold their happinesses, which helps their relationship endure.
Shakespeare writes two kinds of plays, well three… but the history plays are irrelevant for this discussion. His main two types are comedies and dramas. The dramas end with death, and the comedies, well they end in marriage! So exciting. Countless reality TV couples choose to live out a Shakespearean drama. Consequently, their relationships, well, die. Bill and Giuliana’s marriage endures because it is a comedy. Amidst the cancer diagnoses, and their agonizing infertility troubles, G&B still found time to have fun.
One of the most moving episodes of G&B’s show documents Giuliana’s breast cancer diagnosis following her and Bill’s extensive failure to conceive a child; one hell of an anxiety filled domino game of life if you ask me. G and B just unravel in front of the camera. Bill’s been through cancer before with his Dad, so you can see the fear build in his eyes. After B&G have had enough of all the draining emotional turmoil, the crying and moping, instead of sinking into a chest wrenching, sobfest depression, G books a carriage ride through Central Park for her and her boo to relax. Yes. Just, yes.
Giuliana not only endures one of the most challenging periods of her life to date, but she then has the bravery and compassion for her partner to pick herself up, and enjoy life with her boo despite their misfortune. Some people might view this gallivant around town as denial, and to those people I hope your loved ones have nice therapists to relieve your burdens from their shoulders. Yeah, life sucks sometimes. Other times, it’s a blast, and just because a terrible tragedy has come upon you and/or your boo, it’s not time to curl up and die. The brave know when to put their problems aside and get on a fucking carriage ride with the love of their life.
And let’s be real for a second, B&G, they could totally afford to avoid that step in the right direction, and wallow with their therapists, and drugs, and whatever other kinds of meandering washed up reality TV stars do for the rest of their lives because they’re rich enough now to not do anything else. However, these two muster up the courage to overcome all that shit, and take time to enjoy each other. Throughout Giuliana’s struggle with infertility and cancer, she plans a romantic carriage ride for her hubby. Real love keeps dates even in inclement weather. If you let it, life can be really sad. Silver linings… that’s where it’s at.
Life sucks a lot of the time, but Bill and Giuliana, y’all will be just fine. Next time we’re all in the Chi, we best be seeing each other in Pilates. I’ll bring my mom. She’s been practicing. In the mean time, I’m working on picking myself up from the dark times. You know, like when I’ve been to five Goodwill’s around town and none of them have any goddamn dining room chairs I like. F that shyt. And hey, I’m taken. Wait, guys, remember The Apprentice?
Thanks I’m Not Obsessed for the image!
Rebecca is a midwestern, Jewish, only child. She believes in love. She apologizes when she's wrong. Her favorite food has always been Cheerios, but she just learned that she's probably allergic to gluten, so that's happening...
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